London, GB | Formerly of New York, Buenos Aires, Fife, and the Western Cape. | Saoránach d’Éirinn.

The Abolition of Humour

Police Inspector Blog, by “Inspector Gadget”, is a pseudonymous blog written by a police officer that documents the absolute ridiculousness of modern British policing. The inspector has also published a book documenting how “you can be arrested for pinching a few crisps from a schoolfriend, throwing cream cakes or denying the existence of Santa Claus – while burglars, muggers and drug dealers go about their business unmolested by the forces of law and order”. I’ve been reading the blog for years now and it definitely lives up to its tag phrase of “You couldn’t make it up!”

Gadget’s latest post shows how humour has been systematically abolished in the modern police services:

In my job, outside of the public order van on a Saturday night, there is precious little opportunity for a really good laugh. With new probationary officers (now called Student Constables) encouraged to note down any “inappropriate” conversations between their peers, the ability to “challenge” ones colleagues for politically incorrect language a prerequisite for career advancement and the new Police Regulations making it an offence to even hear something “inappropriate” without reporting it, even the van is strangely quiet.

Humour is almost exclusively at someone else’s expense, and in todays modern police service, we cannot mock anything or anyone, even if they can’t hear us, without being labelled as an “ist” of some kind. The public can ridicule the police as much as they like of course.

So, eight beautiful girls on a hen night, two men with funny hats, a uni-cyclist(???) and three lads dressed as penguins all walk past without even a comment or a snigger from the F Division Public Order team.

One night, an absolutely stunning woman approached the van and pulled aside her blouse to show us her naked chest. This happens a lot in Ruraltown, and in every big town. Hen night ladies are notorious for it. Imagine her shame when we simply stared at her, unmoved and silent.

“What the hell is wrong with you lads? You havent seen better than this have you?”

What was I supposed to say?

“I’m sorry madam but your outdated and sexist humour is not appreciated here; we are modern policemen you know, now move on and show your flesh no more.”

Shamelessly using the anonymity of this Blog, I feel that I can finally answer the lady in question. And my answer is this, No, we have not seen better than that. I thank you.

Via Hilary.

Published at 10:51 am on Friday 12 March 2010. Categories: Errant Thoughts Great Britain Tags: .
Comments

Hmmm…

a link from Cusack.

At long last.

— Hilary White 12 Mar 2010 3:06 pm

Surely you’ve been linked to by me before?

At the very least, you’re in the side-bar.

— Andrew Cusack 12 Mar 2010 3:11 pm

Sources of innocent merriment are being dried up by the false morality of political correctness. Well now! A round of G&S for bobbies. Reminds me of the late Lord Cavendish’s affinities.

— Francis 14 Mar 2010 2:53 pm
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